It was exactly one year ago today I went on a 9-day silent retreat. 

I remember a sinking feeling in my stomach as we approached the monastery.

I felt nervous. But most of all what I remember were thoughts screaming at me: "Why on earth am I going to a monastery to spend nine days in silence with some monks?"

We pulled into the parking lot and my husband offered to carry my bags into the reception area. I told him to leave me there and just go. I wanted my family to depart as quickly as possible, or else I'd be too tempted to jump back in the car and go with them!

I checked in and found my room. The door next to mine led to a chapel and prayer room. There was a crucifix above my bed. Nothing else on the walls. Oh god, what had I let myself in for?.......